WASN’T IT JACK LONDON WHO SAID:

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attitude, enjoying life, Quotations; Living

 

“I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry-rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.”

  

 

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HOW CAN YOU STAY HAPPY AND HEALTHY …..

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Aging, attitude, enjoying life, Growing Older

While at the same time you’re growing older …..

As we well know, most women very early form a habit of putting everyone else first. When she becomes a mother this is a “natural” habit that very soon becomes a life-style. It stays with her. A consequence of this, though, is that as we grow older, we’re often unaware of what activities we can enter into, which will boost our mood, our attitude and immunity. But there are a few things, that even the so-called experts agree on, that will help us through this.

Here are one or two suggestions.

TALK. Bottling up worries or sadness is deeply unhealthy and guaranteed to suppress immunity. If you feel sad, chat with a friend and don’t be afraid to cry. Tears are a good way of releasing repressed emotions and stress. If you feel you need more than that, ask your GP to refer you to a professional counsellor.

LISTEN TO MUSIC. Countless studies show that laughter is hugely beneficial to health – and sharing laughter is better still. So rent a funny DVD, get some friends around and let your humour take over. If you’re not really into some of the “modern” humour, why not even drag out of the kid’s cartoons/Walt Disney films? Just be a kid again – even if you have grey hair and wrinkles.

EAT and DRINK. In moderation – of course! But then why do we always put limitations on what we should do, especially to relax and recharge our batteries. Seriously though, don’t let the fact that just because you might be alone, that you needn’t go to the bother of laying the table properly for a meal. Put a small vase of flowers of a specimen rose beside your plate setting, and enjoy a nice wine (even non-alcoholic). Too often we can feel guilty about enjoying ourselves, which is not the way it should be. Tell yourself, I deserve to be pampered and if this means pampering yourself, then so be it. You’ll soon believe it.

PRAY. Even those with “no-faith” understand the importance of having a special little place in their home such as a small side table with family photos, flowers, a candle, anything that represents beauty and love, will bring a warm sense of well-being. Those with faith, know the importance and the countless benefits they receive from actually praying or talking with God.

THINK POSITIVE. Hard to at times, but work at it. Never go to sleep fretting over a problem. It achieves nothing. A better idea before going to bed is to concentrate on all the happy (even tiny) events of the day for a few minutes. Avoid negative thoughts at all costs.

Stay away from people who constantly bombard us with doom and gloom. Never lose hope. Remember, miracles do happen, every day, to ordinary every-day people, like you and me.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL.   MAY YOUR DAY BE FILLED WITH MUCH LOVE AND MANY NICE SURPRISES. 

 

 

MANNEQUINS LARGE AS LIFE

Tags

Body-Image, Confidence, Plus Size, Self-Esteem

 

So read the headlines of an article in a recent issue of the Melbourne Sun-Herald (Victoria, Australia).

I sat up and took notice!  It now had my full attention so I read on:

“Slender models and clothes draped over stick-thin mannequins in shops have long caused women untold anguish.”

Well, they’re right there!   The article goes on:

“Now British department store chain Debenhams has made a step forward in promoting body confidence by becoming the first high street retailer in the UK to permanently introduce size 16 mannequins.

The mannequins will be used at its shop in Oxford Street, London, and appear alongside size 10 dummies on all women’s fashion floors, before being introduced in all 170 Debenhams’ UK stores”.

This must be one of the best Christmas presents size 16 (and plus) women have had for decades.  One can hope that Australian chain stores will see the wisdom in making a decision such as this, and do something similar.  It’s about time.

I, and other like-minded professional women, have put this idea and suggestion forward to the retailers here in Australia for decades without success.  Perhaps now they’ll realise that their customers are not all size 6, but include the curvaceous and everything in between.

(Clipart is of the famous “Elle” plus size doll).

 

 

YOU shouldn’t wear THAT!

Tags

Aging, Confidence, Growing Older, Self-Esteem

Honestly!!!!!!!

I’ve been hearing this, and similar things, since I was a kid. You shouldn’t eat this, you shouldn’t eat that. you shouldn’t wear this, you shouldn’t wear that!

I got a few years grace from all this flak, or so I thought. I reckon it’s probably because I just shrugged my shoulders and got on with life.

But all of a sudden, I’m being told – again! You shouldn’t be wearing that!

Am I committing a crime or something? It’s not as though I’ve run amok, is it?

I saw a lovely little short-sleeved cardigan recently and bought it!   Modern styling, totally different from I’ve previously chosen or worn. It’s in a pretty dove grey colour, and worn over one of my long-sleeved shirts, looks good, even if I say so myself. I feel good wearing it.

Well – first of all it was a “friend” (well, she thinks she is) – “that’s a bit young for you isn’t it?” Then my own young grand-daughter, “Hey Nan, you don’t want that do you, this is more my style”. The lady serving coffee took one look and said, “I thought of getting myself something like that, but I was told I would be mutton made up as lamb”. (She’s only in her 30s so who is she kidding?) Was she giving me a subtle message?

Hey look, I no longer care what other people think about what I choose for my wardrobe. I made up my mind a long time that “other people” didn’t necessarily know what’s best for me, and now I’m certain. By the way, I’ve just put on my lovely dove grey cardigan (with some other clothes I hope you realise!) and am ready to go shopping – what I’ll find may be interesting!

Recognising BEAUTY for what it is at whatever age! – Part II

Tags

Aging, Confidence, Growing Older, Self-Esteem

Why is it, especially in western society, that older women are seen to be “unlovely” because of their wrinkles, their faded complexions, their thinning hair?  I ask this because it is quite obvious in many cultures that aging is equated with wisdom and that age, in the number of years, to be seen as something to be admired.

Women of age, and of different nationalities are nurtured and loved within the family unit;  it’s not unusual to see four generations in the one home all doing their own thing, but being mentored in the womanly arts of cooking, craft work, good manners and etiquette among each other, by the eldest member (s) of the family.

Take for instance our Greek and Italian friends. They live for each other, they go places and do things together; they eat together, they celebrate together.  They help each other.  They cook for each other, they do for each other.  When there is a need it is met by others within the family.  They don’t even seem to notice age differences.  It’s the people and personalities that seem to matter.  Funny thing, that.

I have a personal friend – a lovely Chinese woman Linda, whose large home she shares with her husband, their daughter and son and their partners, their little children.  Her home is also shared with her mother.  This wonderful great grand-mother is revered as the sage of the family;  everyone seeks her advice and everyone treats her as a special precious gem.  She is included in every discussion and every decision made within the family.  She is in her late 80s.   Her great grand-children are in her care during the day.  The joy this family has in her presence in their lives is overwhelming in its simplicity and intensity.

Yet I have another friend in her 60s who is ignored by her children and grandchildren.  They’re too busy.  She is forgotten for months on end, and then usually it’s only when someone wants something that she has that they will contact her.  She is very seldom included in family get-togethers (birthday, Christmas, Easter) and there’s always an excuse as to why she is “forgotten”.  This lady lives less than 3 kms from her son.   She lives alone and her loneliness has brought with it illness and lines of anxiety and worry (which could have been avoided if she’d been able to talk through things with the family).  Yet she did everything for her family when they were younger;  gave them as much as she could and more, was always available for baby-sitting and house-minding when the grandchildren were small and when they went on holidays.   But now in her growing older years, she’s seen to be a nuisance, and she’s made to feel it, too.

What is doubly sad about this second lady is that her grandchildren actually told her that she looked “ugly” because she’s old, and they’ve even laughed about her, in her presence.   The fact that they now ignore her, is something that she bears because she feels she has to, and because it’s easier to do so.

From what I’ve experienced, as Western women, we tend to look at our reflections as something that needs “beautifying” or making younger by way of anti-aging methods, one way or the way.   Shouldn’t we take time to look at ourselves and to study our reflections seeing the beautiful things about us that no one else on this planet shares?    Many women from western cultures who are growing older or who are deemed to be “old” have forgotten how to love themselves.  They’ve forgotten that they are uniquely formed and created.

We’ve got to get back to basics.   We’ve got to treat ourselves as the person we are, not necessarily the age we are.   We’re no different to that young teenager wanting to be accepted by a peer group;  we’re no different to that young woman wanting to have a happy home and family;  we’re no different to the maturing woman wanting to have a career or satisfaction in her hobby, leisure pursuit or even a personal enterprise.  We’re no different to that woman through all her states of womanhood as she seeks companionship and love and affection.

What’s age got to do with anything?  OK, so we slow down.   Our bodies are impacted by gravity and in some cases, illnesses.

But that shouldn’t stop us from doing the things we’ve always wanted to do;  and to pamper ourselves every now and again.   We should be able to experiment with new things, new dreams, new goals, without having to justify why.   Have fun.  Don’t take any nonsense from anyone!  Don’t accept bad manners, or inappropriate attitudes and/or behaviour.

Recognising BEAUTY for what it is – at whatever age!

Tags

Aging, Growing Older

Miss Piggy probably said it best:

 “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye.”

 But let’s seriously consider it.  It’s a very old sentiment which has been around since the 3rd century and while many men have included that sentiment in their work (Shakespeare for one), the actual quotation “beauty is in the eye of the beholder” was first seen in print in 1878.  Margaret Wolfe Hungerford (nee Hamilton) who wrote many books often under the pseudonym of “The Duchess” wrote “Molly Bawn” in 1878 and used the phrase “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”.

 And the saying and the meaning behind the saying is as pertinent today as it was when first penned.

 You only have to look at the animal world to see that it’s true.  Mothers just adore their off-spring and it’s the same with us.  A new born babe will bring oohs and aahs and sighs of delights.

 Take your surroundings – things of beauty dazzle our eyes every moment of every day.  Beautiful flowers, extraordinary sunsets.  The moon reflected on the water.  The sight of Uluru after it has rained.  The sound of a country stream merrily singing as it travels down a hillside.  The quietness and beauty of the forest.   Tiny little insects – ladybirds and the like, small birds learning to fly; the snuffling of a wombat.   We will spend time just watching their antics and movements.  Funny little kittens and puppy dogs.  Even little children as they try to walk and in doing so keep toppling over.

 It’s not only young things that are beautiful.  Oh yes, the body of a “gorgeous” young woman will bring similar oohs and aahs and in fact will convince other young women that they should emulate the beauty defined by the media while those of us who are older, smile and remember!

 As far as “beauty” is concerned, where does that leave the growing older woman?  Or the woman in her prime – the 70s, 80s and 90s?

 It’s weird, but men seem to be besotted and enamoured by battered old rusty cars or utes.  They’ll spend hours longingly cleaning them and doing them up.  But what do they do when their girl-friends or wives grow a little old and rusty?  Trade ’em in for a later model.  Crazy!

 They may even cunningly suggest that she’s let herself “go” and could do with a bit of Botox (or not!) which should be taken with a grain of salt.  What do you really want botox for?  To hide the life-experiences that show the world that you’ve lived?  We should never be taken for granted or persuaded to change our looks merely for the sake of “looking younger”.  Why?  The hands and neck will tell the story anyway and no botox will help those areas.

 (And anyway, do most of us actually KNOW what Botox is?  It is made from “botulinum toxin type A”, a poison produced by the bacterium Clostridium botulinum, which causes botulism, a severe form of food poisoning.

 Botox is injected into the muscles used in frowning and raising the eyebrows to paralyze them and thus smooth out the wrinkles. Common side effects of Botox injection include droopy eyebrow or eyelid, headache, respiratory infection, flu syndrome, and nausea.)

To be continued:

WAYS to FEEL GOOD about YOURSELF!

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Self-Confidence

If you’re lacking in self-confidence, don’t despair.  There are many ways in which you can give yourself a boost.  Here are some.

*  Rethink your past “mistakes” as lessons learnt which will help you to prevent future ones.

*  Next time somebody compliments you, don’t automatically protest but graciously accept.

*  Give yourself time to feel good.

*  Give yourself a pep talk.  Encourage yourself just as do your best friend, or as a best friend would do for you.

*  Wake up happy.  Begin each day with a fun routine.  Sing in the shower. If you’re not already in a cheerful mood, put on your favourite upbeat CD; load it into your stereo the night before!

*  Tell yourself that you are brave as well as likeable.  Next time you feel tempted to say hello to a person in a queue, go right ahead.

*  Learn a new skill such as gourmet cuisine, silk painting or pottery.  Learning the basics will give you a taste of success.

*  Even if you’re not feeling confident, ACT as if you are.  Soon you will realise you’re no longer faking it.

*  When you reach an objective, allow for a period of celebration before going on to the next goal.

*  Keep a written list of all your accomplishments, however small.  Next time feelings of inadequacy threaten to dampen your spirits, you’ll have something to look back on and be proud of.

*  Discard the myth of perfection.  Nobody is perfect.

*  Take risks.  You’ll accomplish more and feel good about being brave.

Never, never, never compare yourself with others.

 ©2013 Rosemary’s NoteBook , Australia